Sunday, 31 August 2014

Nevermind the four-year-old, am I School Ready?

Excuse me while I bore off about my son starting school next week AGAIN. I've posted a blog on the Huff Post here if you care to take a read.

Thursday, 28 August 2014

Goodbye pre-school son


Good bye pre-school son, at the nursery gates today for your last day.


Good bye starting the day when you feel like it.
Good bye being picked up early, no explaination required.
Good bye dressing like a super hero, just cos.
Good bye hugs on demand.
Good bye hanging out in a class of 9.
Good bye crusing round, doing what you choose.
Good bye sitting on the teacher's lap.
Good bye bringing toys to class.
Good bye no expectations, no judgement.
Good bye being a pre-schooler.

And for me;
Good bye dropping you off at 'Kay's House'.
Good bye twenty minute chats with Kay at the gate.
Good bye recognising all 8 of your classmates by name.
Good bye rolling up when I get my butt in gear.
Good bye knowing Kay is on-call, anytime.
Good bye being the person you spend most of your week with.
Good bye detailed notes about your day, everyday.
Good bye holidaying when we need it, not when we have to.
Good bye no expectations, no judgement.
Good bye pre-school son.

Friday, 4 July 2014

Summer Hols



Just a quick post to say thanks so much for all your amazing support on the Telegraph thang I wrote. 11K shares!!!! Super chuffed and totally blown away by all the lovely comments. Thank you!

I'm taking a break for the summer but normal service will resume in September. I may do the odd post and will try to comment on blogs now and then, but mainly I will be savouring a long uninterrupted summer with my children - the eldest starts school in September. Gulp! So I feel the need to make the most of this precious time. And drink Pimms.

Have a lovely summer people, but don't forget me. Catch up again in the Autumn. xxx

Wednesday, 25 June 2014

Sunday, 22 June 2014

What I REALLY thought about BritMumsLive



Wow, BritMumsLive, what a weekend. So many highs;


  • It was AMAZING to meet the real people behind the blogs I've admired since the first time I ever hit publish. I was so nervous of things going 'Catfish' but all went swimmingly. Everyone was even more lovely and inspiring in real life.

  • The Bloggers Keynote - such talented, strong, funny, inspiring bloggers. You made me weep fat tears, laugh like a child and be proud to be a blogger. Definitely the best part of the programme. 

  • The seminars - at last, I have a slippery grip on Google +, SEOs and the point of going self-hosted. It's takes a lot to make me see the point of these things but somehow the Britmums seminar leaders did it. Thank you!

  • The organisers - everyone I met was super helpful and well organised. Good job.

Just a few teeny, tiny lows... And bear with me on these. I am sooooo nervous about posting them. Please don't bury me forever Britmums. I'm just being honest - like many of your seminar leaders urged. Not all of them though...

  • Some of the speakers joked about lying and sleeping your way to the top. Once would have been fine, but it just kept coming up. First up; know your audience, speakers. We're mums!!!! Lying around sleeping? What's that then?

  • But seriously, no matter how you take those throw away comments, they're not inspiring. Who wants to be flat on their back, when they could be staring at a keyboard, pouring out their soul to an unseen, unguaranteed audience at two in the morning, between baby-wakings and six am starts? ;-) Who wants to fake it in the only place that's 100% theirs? If we can't be ourselves on our blogs - our passion, our pride, our biggest platform - what's the point? For me, blogging is all about being yourself, answering to no one and doing what you love. Like hell I'm gonna trash that with ANYTHING that doesn't feel true. Especially not now I've got a daughter. I don't know why that makes a difference, but it does. 

  • Awards. Yep, this is a tricky one. Hands up, I was shortlisted in Fresh Voice, but didn't make the final, so maybe this is all bitterness. But I can't talk about the BiBs without talking about how disappointed I was with how things worked out. For me, Fresh Voice winners (and any category, really) should reflect the every-woman who's worked hard, probably in their very limited and precious spare time, to pour their heart into something that means the world to them - whether that's writing, making people laugh, aiding a cause they believe in or indulging in a hobby they love. Awards that celebrate this should not be pitching talented, passionate enthusiasts against celebs with professional expertise, a massive network, professional experience, resources and a built-in audience behind them. Especially in the Fresh Voice category, which by definition is supposed to be about newbies. I'm not saying this year's winner doesn't have a good blog that she cares about - more that she should not have been in this category. There's a reason you don't see celebs winning The Voice, Britain's Got Talent and X Factor; It's. Not. Fair. That said, the finalists took the results way more gracefully than I did and any bitterness is mine alone, as far as I know.

Anyway, can't quite believe I've posted this. Please don't hate me celebs. Please don't banish me Britmums. I'm speaking up for what I think blogging should be all about. Is it just me?

Friday, 20 June 2014

I'm going to Britmums Live!





Twitter ID@mmearthmother
Height: 5ft 2
Hair: Dark, short, bed headesque...
Eyes: Blue
Is this your first blogging conference?
Yes! Whoop whoop!
Are you attending both days?
Yes. Fully expecting to be a shadow of myself on Saturday thou.
What are you most looking forward to at BritMums Live 2014?
Putting a real life face to my blogging buddies. Blog geekery. Having a conversation without a bottle in my hand. Oh wait....
What are you wearing?
Turquoise maxi dress and Converse. I tried very hard to remove the Converse but it ain't happening.
What do you hope to gain from BritMums Live 2014?
Meeting new blogging buddies. Getting to know those I've already met on-line.
Do you have any tips to pass on to others who may not have been before?
I'm a Britmums virgin so your guess is as good as mine. But my good mate Wry Mummy has done these cracking posts, which I'm living by.
What To Wear To BritMums Live? I am caught between a tart and a frump.
What To Drink At BritMums Live? Where I come out as a gin-refuser. Makes me melancholically murderous - you'll thank me for refraining.
What To Say At BritMums Live? Have you done your "Murder Board" yet?

Can't wait to meet you! xxxxx

Wednesday, 11 June 2014

Do I really want Baby Girl to be a high flier?

I used to dream of being an air hostess when I was a kid - yes they were still called hostesses back then, but let's not dwell on that. I loved the idea of travelling the world, getting to eat those cute little airline meals and OK, the uniforms were pretty cool too - FOR THE 1980s.

Weirdly, things don't seem to have moved on since then. In fact, they've regressed. BA's female cabin crew now wear prim little retro hats and more make-up than a New Romantic. (Blusher and lipstick, at the very least, are compulsory.) Hell, they're not even allowed to wear trousers. Outlawed in 2010, apparently, despite the Baltic temperatures on most flights. 

And what happens to those fresh-faced feminists who flout the rules? Grounded, a la Jodie from a Very British Airline who was fired from the BA training program after being asked to reapply her lipstick four times on Monday night's show. Yeah, cause that's what all cabin crew need; MORE make-up. Us women are totally unpresentable without it, don't you know? 

Check out this video by BA if you need convincing.



Now, I like my slap as much as the next woman, but if I was ordered to wear it by an employer to 'add an extra layer of confidence', along with a 1950s-esque uniform I had absolutely no say over, I don't think it would make me feel proud and professional. I think it would make me feel like a doll, but then maybe that's where the term 'Trolly Dolly' comes from...

Still, at least British Airways don't expect their female cabin crew to take their uniforms off. Undeterred by being branded sexist in 2012 and having the ad for their charity calender banned for being offensive to women, Ryanair continue to put the cheap into cheap airlines


Their 2014 calendar features female bikini-clad crew members on all fours on the beach.


Poor Miss July - Ryanair were obviously too tight to even stretch to swimwear - she had to make do with her bra and pants. #Tightarse


Memo to Ryanair boss from Miss July; 'We said we wanted to burn our bras, not sunburn in our bras. Duh!'


So, what happens if Baby Girl decides she wants a career in the skies? I'll be encouraging her to be a pilot instead.

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